I am angry, disappointed and confused. Why does my friend keep trying to sleep with my friends? And why does it bother me so much? I want to be above this, to be confident enough in myself and in my relationships to move forward without this anger and frustration!

   So tell me Trin, what exactly am I supposed to get out of this situation? How am I supposed to grow?? Yeah, I'm angry, and hurt.., and disappointed in my friend KS. This is yet another reason I don't trust women. Why would she tell me about this? I don't want to know. I don't know why I am so affected. I am attracted to him, yes, and I care for him, obviously. But not in a romantic way. I feel played! I feel like KS set me up months ago, that she planted this interest in my head even though I never previously felt it. And then I started to question it, question our friendship, his possible feelings for me. And then they move in on each other. Thanks for making me feel not only like a complete fool but completely rejected, ugly, useless, and now alone...

    I hate that I'm still into CS. How can that man do no wrong in my eyes and why do I let him get away with it?? I deserve better! I finally realize that he's not good enough for me. He's not good enough for me. I deserve someone who is not afraid to pursue me, someone who can see me and is not afraid to show me how they feel. But I still want him. I'm still attracted to him. My heart still yearns to be with him, to kiss him, to spend hours talking to him about anything and everything under the stars.

    Where's my prince Trinity? I know he's out there. And maybe CS's purpose was to help me heal and finally distance myself from BP. I think of Troy often. The connection was quick and intense, almost doesnt seem real now. But he's a friend's boyfriend. How wrong is that to want to reach out to a man who is technically taken? She doesn't deserve that, he doesn't deserve that, and I DEFINITELY dont deserve that! 

     I seem to be seeking love in all the wrong places. Trin, help me to understand that an emotional connection between a man and woman, doesn't always yield an attraction or a potential relationship. Help me to forgive my friends for acting on their impulse and to be thankful it didn't go any farther. Help me to let all of this go, and realize that my purpose is greater than even I can see. My destiny is in your hands. Thy will not mine be done.

 For today, I am grateful that I can feel and express my anger and hurt. I am thankful that I no longer have to stuff my feelings and that I no longer have to pretend. I am loveable, kind, and thoughtful... and I am truly loved.